Ltrey's 'Mock' Mock Draft: Picks 1-17

1. Vikings (from Texans) – Herschel Walker, RB
The Vikings trade picks in rounds 2-7, plus Daunte Culpepper, Darren Sharper, Nate Burleson, Matt Birk and Kevin Williams for the first pick in the draft. Good move guys.

2. Saints- Ryan Leaf, QB
The Saints are hoping that if they bring in the biggest disaster to ever hit the NFL, they’ll be able to take the focus off of Katrina for a while.

3. Titans- Stretch Armstrong/Mr. Fantastic, WR
The Titans, still reeling over their loss in Super Bowl XXXVI look for a receiver that could stretch their arm that extra yard. I’m undecided whether they’ll go with Stretch Armstrong or Mr. Fantastic though, either could fit the bill.

4. Jets- Albert Einstein’s Brain, Unknown
The Jets hope that by drafting the brain of the man who determined the theory of relativity that they can somehow use his knowledge to create a time machine and go back to a time when Chad Pennington’s shoulder didn't have the strength of a fourteen year old girl’s. It’s either that or Jay Cutler.

5. Packers- Brett Favre, QB
So what if he’s at the end of his career? The Packers are so blinded by the past that they want to sign him to another multi-year deal. Don’t worry about him getting old though, they’ll probably take Bart Starr in the second round as an insurance policy.

6. Raiders- Kim Jung Il, Dictator
Al Davis decides to draft the North Korean dictator to show the world that there is someone else that looks just as crazy as he does.
http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y12...33/kimjung.jpg http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y12...dJacobsohn.jpg

7. 49ers- Brian Bosworth, LB
Although they were leaning towards A.J. Hawk, the 49ers became fascinated with Brian Bosworth’s upside and decide to draft the linebacker, but not his film career.

8. Bills- Scott Norwood, K
The Bills solve their kicking situation with the selection of Norwood. The Bills will most likely be crushed however when Norwood, while going to accept his #1 jersey from Commissioner Tagliabue, breaks his kicking leg by falling off of the stage after missing the stairs—wide right.

9. Lions- Probably a wide receiver….:roll:

10. Cardinals- U-Haul Moving Company
The Cards decide to bypass all of the football players on the board at this point and draft the U-Haul Moving Company’s fleet of trucks to move them the hell out of Arizona!

11. Rams- Spurgeon Wynn, QB
The Rams pick Wynn here because for some reason they have a way of turning guys who suck (Kurt Warner, Marc Bulger, Ryan Fitzpatrick) into superstars, and believe me, Wynn sucks.

12. Browns- Does it really matter?

13. Ravens- A.J. Hawk, LB
Knowing they are completely set on offense, having super stars at every position, the Ravens decide to draft more defense.

14. Eagles- Anyone but Terrell Owens.

15. Falcons- Former FEMA Director Michael Brown, Sniveling Worm
If anyone can think of enough excuses to get Michael Vick off of the hook for being a crappy quarterback, it’s this guy. Although they may be disappointed with his performance as the only excuse he can come up with is "It's Bush's fault."

16. Dolphins- Dan Marino, QB
Marino comes out of retirement after coach Nick Saban collapses at the draft screaming “Please God! JUST GIVE ME A QUARTERBACK!”

17. Vikings- Demetrius Underwood, DE
With the only pick in the draft that they DIDN’T trade for Herschel Walker, the Vikes decide to give Underwood another try. Sure, it didn’t work out the first time, but with Zygi Wilf willing to shell out the dough to hire a full time team of psychiatrists and animal control personnel, Underwood should feel right at home.

So what does everyone think? :lol: (and yes, I made this up)

Pretty good, ltrey...for a DOOKIE fan!!! :evil4:

I think you got everything perfect... I mean everything. :lol:

Wow!!! it's as if you can see the future!

i don't think arizona will pick u-haul... too pricey, they'll probably go with PODS. :lol:

If you guys think THIS is funny...

In the 1994 CFL draft, the Ottawa Rough Riders actually drafted a dead person. The prospect they were interested in actually died about a week before the draft.

That was a good one Itey.

LMAO!

What ever happened to "Dughh"metrius ???

"vikesoto" wrote:

Quote:

---

What ever happened to "Dughh"metrius ???

---

Who knows where he is now. He was skitzo, was hearing voices from above, left during training camp, could have been ok with meds but refused to take them. He went bye bye. WOW!!!!!!!!

That was a wierd turn of events. He just disappeared from training camp. I remember hearing about it and waiting for the updates on SportCenter. It took a day or two to figure it out if I remember right.

:scratch: I really thought the Packers would pick Tony Mandrich with their first overall pick. :???: