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  1. #1
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    You Skip Voluntary Workout

    [size=12pt]You Skip Voluntary Workout[/size]
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    You skipped a voluntary workout today, continuing a long personal history of missing workouts. Those close to you admit they are worried that you aren’t truly dedicated, and feel you will be out of shape and susceptible to injury down the road.

    “I don’t want to make more of it than it is,” said your girlfriend. “But after our recent breakup, I thought he would be doing everything to really keep up appearances. Then the first opportunity he has, he skips a workout to – what? Who knows. Play PlayStation?”

    Your boss stressed that the workout was voluntary.

    “Would it have been great had he done it? Absolutely,” he said. “But it was a voluntary workout. His girlfriend can’t make him go. I can’t make him go. And, to his credit, he has for the five years he’s worked here, kept himself in good enough shape to do his job and not die. As soon as that changes – or as soon as he’s abusing our health care plan with treatment for various fatty ailments – that’s when it becomes more serious and something to worry about.”

    Despite your no-show, almost all of your friends went to the gym for a workout today.

    “I wish he had been here,” said your best friend. “It’s not a big deal. But it’s just something he should do to build camaraderie and show he’s one of us. We don’t want to be here any more than he does. But he should be here suffering along with us. That’s what you do when you’re part of a team.”

    Your former college roommate said you can’t rest on your laurels.

    “Back in the day he could get away with this stuff, maybe,” he said. “Back in college when he was benching close to 300 pounds. But he needs to realize he’s not that guy anymore. He’s not a superstar. Age is catching up to him. He needs to put in the work. Sure, he still has flashes – he pushed my new couch up the stairs into my apartment last weekend all by himself – but he’s not the guy benching 285 anymore.”

    With another voluntary workout scheduled for tomorrow, it’s not known if you will participate in that one either.

    “We’ll see. We’ll see what’s going on,” you said. “But I don’t care what other people think. I’m good to go. I don’t need all this working out. I never have. It’s just how my body is. I may not look like I’m in great shape. But I could be ripped and trim in a couple of weeks if I wanted to be. Look how I easily I can pick up my coffee tabl- ... Ahh! F—k! My back!”
    Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. Mark Twain

  2. #2
    jessejames09's Avatar
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    Re: You Skip Voluntary Workout

    "Prophet" wrote:
    [size=12pt]You Skip Voluntary Workout[/size]
    sportsp.com



    You skipped a voluntary workout today, continuing a long personal history of missing workouts. Those close to you admit they are worried that you aren’t truly dedicated, and feel you will be out of shape and susceptible to injury down the road.

    “I don’t want to make more of it than it is,” said your girlfriend. “But after our recent breakup, I thought he would be doing everything to really keep up appearances. Then the first opportunity he has, he skips a workout to – what? Who knows. Play PlayStation?”

    Your boss stressed that the workout was voluntary.

    “Would it have been great had he done it? Absolutely,” he said. “But it was a voluntary workout. His girlfriend can’t make him go. I can’t make him go. And, to his credit, he has for the five years he’s worked here, kept himself in good enough shape to do his job and not die. As soon as that changes – or as soon as he’s abusing our health care plan with treatment for various fatty ailments – that’s when it becomes more serious and something to worry about.”

    Despite your no-show, almost all of your friends went to the gym for a workout today.

    “I wish he had been here,” said your best friend. “It’s not a big deal. But it’s just something he should do to build camaraderie and show he’s one of us. We don’t want to be here any more than he does. But he should be here suffering along with us. That’s what you do when you’re part of a team.”

    Your former college roommate said you can’t rest on your laurels.

    “Back in the day he could get away with this stuff, maybe,” he said. “Back in college when he was benching close to 300 pounds. But he needs to realize he’s not that guy anymore. He’s not a superstar. Age is catching up to him. He needs to put in the work. Sure, he still has flashes – he pushed my new couch up the stairs into my apartment last weekend all by himself – but he’s not the guy benching 285 anymore.”

    With another voluntary workout scheduled for tomorrow, it’s not known if you will participate in that one either.

    “We’ll see. We’ll see what’s going on,” you said. “But I don’t care what other people think. I’m good to go. I don’t need all this working out. I never have. It’s just how my body is. I may not look like I’m in great shape. But I could be ripped and trim in a couple of weeks if I wanted to be. Look how I easily I can pick up my coffee tabl- ... Ahh! F—k! My back!”
    Fuck that shit.. I'm holding out for Albert Haynseworth money (or at least Fred Evans $). I'm also willing to skip camp.

  3. #3
    Prophet's Avatar
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    Re: You Skip Voluntary Workout

    "jessejames09" wrote:
    Fuck that shit.. I'm holding out for Albert Haynseworth money. I'm also willing to skip camp.
    According to Marrdro, you can attend the Vikings' camp and it is so pansy-ass that you won't have to worry about losing your pouch while working out.
    Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. Mark Twain

  4. #4
    jessejames09's Avatar
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    Re: You Skip Voluntary Workout

    "Prophet" wrote:
    "jessejames09" wrote:
    Fuck that shit.. I'm holding out for Albert Haynseworth money. I'm also willing to skip camp.
    According to Marrdro, you can attend the Vikings' camp and it is so pansy-ass that you won't have to worry about losing your pouch while working out.
    Maybe they'll move me to center... Although I like that idea, keep me fresh for the regular season. (bait set)

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