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  1. #1
    shockzilla's Avatar
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    Shock's Movie Reviews - "Hellboy II: The Golden Army"

    In a summer full of "superhero" movies, it could be hard to tell the good ones (Ironman) from the not-so-good-ones (Hancock) just by the trailers alone. Hollywood nowadays has a tendency to cram all the good parts of the movie into the trailer, and leave the rest of the movie for the bad (again, Hancock is a good example of this).

    No need to worry about this movie - the makers of "Hellboy II: The Golden Army" left a lot of the good stuff out of the trailers and left it in the movie.

    For those of you not familiar with "Hellboy" (played with wondrous glee by Ron Perlman), he is a comic book favorite. He's a blood-red demon with filed-down horns, a temper and a girlfriend who is also a human torch. Oh, and he has a right hand made of stone. And a tail. And he smokes cigars. But other than that he's normal.
    ;D

    The beginning of the movie basically tells the story of how he came to be, so I'll leave that part out. As of now, he's a crime-fighting bad-boy with a smart-ass attitude, one of the members of a monster-fighting unit that no one knows about, kind of like a poor-man's Men In Black.

    For thousands of years a truce between humans, trolls and others has been keeping the peace between the underworld and humans. Now, ruthless Prince Nuada, with milk-white skin and evil temperament, has decided to break the truce and unleash hell on Earth. It's up to Hellboy and his minions to save the day before the evil prince releases "The Golden Army", a horde of gold metal marauders that cannot be stopped.

    That's pretty much the plot for the movie - Hellboy, his girlfriend Liz and the others saving the day for mankind. Here's what I liked about the movie: the director, Guillermo Del Toro ("Blade II", "Hellboy", "Pan's Labryinth") has quite an imagination. The characters he creates, the odd and wonderful worlds they inhabit, and his set design in this movie is nothing short of goofy. But it all fits together like some sort of Star Wars on hallucinogens. And that, I think, is where he has gotten a lot of his ideas from. From the little creatures called the "Tooth Fairies" (wait until you see THESE guys!) to the wacky and elaborate "Troll Market" (think Star Wars cantina scene), Del Toro has created a fresh, original story that inhabits the screen like a real popcorn movie should. And that's what this movie is - a fresh two hours that goes down smoothly like a cold beer.

    And look for some real moments of humanity in this movie - there are several, including a scene involving two guys sitting around, drinking beer, listening to Barry Manilow and bemoaning the fact that love sucks sometimes. I really laughed at that one.

    This was a pretty entertaining movie. I give it:

    out of four.
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  2. #2
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    Re: Shock's Movie Reviews - "Hellboy II: The Golden Army"

    sounds decent.
    I was going back and forth on whether or not to see this one.
    But from the beginning of your post, you weren't a Hancock fan huh?
    I thought it was pretty good, it was an out of the ordinary super hero movie that crossed genres between action and comedy.
    But hey, thats me


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  3. #3
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    Re: Shock's Movie Reviews - "Hellboy II: The Golden Army"

    After watching Pan's Labyrinth(great movie by the way) and seeing the previews for Hellboy II you can definatly see Del Tormo's influence based on the look of the creatures alone. Alot of them almost look like they cam right from that movie into this one.

  4. #4
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    Re: Shock's Movie Reviews - "Hellboy II: The Golden Army"

    I saw this one too Shock.
    I absolutely hated it.

    I liked the first movie though.


    This one was visually stunning, don't get me wrong. And I think those stunning visuals were really overfocused on by production/direction. They seemed to focus on that and ignore any real, important aspects of the movie.

    The dialogue was terrible, too many one-liners from Hellboy, stupid stuff from the torch girl as well. When she's talking before using her powers really made me laugh, it was so dumb.

    The acting was horrendous, looking back the only good performance was from Kraus. The rest was mediocre at best.

    The opening sequence with Hellboy as a kid, and the story his father told being played by puppets really started the movie out poorly for me, from that point on I thought it was gonna be a bust.

    The love story was stupid.

    What they intended to be funny was really hit or miss(about 10% hit, 90% miss), they really tried to incorporate too much comedy in the action scenes. It worked better in the first movie, but in this one they really did it too much.

    The plot development was bad, the story jumped around way too much. Too much coming at you at once at some points. The love story combined with the actual plot of the movie, along with the over the top acting, stunning visuals, the two loudmouth assholes sitting behind me, the broken air conditioning in the theater, and the udder predictability of this movie made for a really awful movie for me.


    I've seen 3 movies this summer.

    Ironman: Awesome, one of my favorites ever. 4/4
    Hancock: Solid 2.75/4
    Hellboy: Really god awful. .5/4 - .5 for the prettiness.

  5. #5
    thevikingfan's Avatar
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    Re: Shock's Movie Reviews - "Hellboy II: The Golden Army"

    I liked hellboy
    hulk ironman and hancock was ok ,going to go see batman tonight heath ledgers last movie i think it will be a hell of a performance

  6. #6
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    Re: Shock's Movie Reviews - "Hellboy II: The Golden Army"

    "Mr" wrote:
    I saw this one too Shock.
    I absolutely hated it.

    I liked the first movie though.


    This one was visually stunning, don't get me wrong. And I think those stunning visuals were really overfocused on by production/direction. They seemed to focus on that and ignore any real, important aspects of the movie.

    The dialogue was terrible, too many one-liners from Hellboy, stupid stuff from the torch girl as well. When she's talking before using her powers really made me laugh, it was so dumb.

    The acting was horrendous, looking back the only good performance was from Kraus. The rest was mediocre at best.

    The opening sequence with Hellboy as a kid, and the story his father told being played by puppets really started the movie out poorly for me, from that point on I thought it was gonna be a bust.

    The love story was stupid.

    What they intended to be funny was really hit or miss(about 10% hit, 90% miss), they really tried to incorporate too much comedy in the action scenes. It worked better in the first movie, but in this one they really did it too much.

    The plot development was bad, the story jumped around way too much. Too much coming at you at once at some points. The love story combined with the actual plot of the movie, along with the over the top acting, stunning visuals, the two loudmouth assholes sitting behind me, the broken air conditioning in the theater, and the udder predictability of this movie made for a really awful movie for me.


    I've seen 3 movies this summer.

    Ironman: Awesome, one of my favorites ever. 4/4
    Hancock: Solid 2.75/4
    Hellboy: Really god awful. .5/4 - .5 for the prettiness.
    So tell us what you really thought of the movie

  7. #7
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    Re: Shock's Movie Reviews - "Hellboy II: The Golden Army"

    Saw this last weekend, and overall I liked it.

    The acting was horrendous, looking back the only good performance was from Kraus. The rest was mediocre at best.
    I kind of agree with Mr. Anderson on this one, the "bad guy" wasn't all that intimidating, and beyond jr.high I don't think he will scare anyone.

    The love story was stupid
    I don't agree with this one.
    I thought it was a nice side plot with plenty of angst at it's imposibility.

    Overall I agree with Shock's rating (might reduce it to 3.5 just because of the "bad guy")

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