Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 19
  1. #1
    RK.'s Avatar
    RK.
    RK. is offline Ring of Fame Rally Cross II Champion
    Join Date
    Dec 1969
    Location
    New Mexico
    Posts
    4,443

    Questions to ponder during off season


    My Favorite is in bold.


    Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are going dead?

    Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money?

    Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?


    Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

    Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

    Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

    Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

    If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

    Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

    Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

    Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

    Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

    Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

    How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

    When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

    Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

    In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

    How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

    The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.

    WWBGD

  2. #2
    BadlandsVikings's Avatar
    BadlandsVikings is offline Jersey Retired
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    26,564

    Re: Questions to ponder during off season

    Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are going dead?

    because we are lazy and it's fun to pound on stuff

  3. #3
    marcosMN is offline Star Spokesman
    Join Date
    Dec 1969
    Location
    Mpls, MN
    Posts
    2,097

    Re: Questions to ponder during off season

    The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.
    Hahaha.

    How true...
    -Sno

  4. #4
    RK.'s Avatar
    RK.
    RK. is offline Ring of Fame Rally Cross II Champion
    Join Date
    Dec 1969
    Location
    New Mexico
    Posts
    4,443

    Re: Questions to ponder during off season

    Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
    Actually now that I think about it he didn't have chest hair either.
    ???

    WWBGD

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Boise Idaho
    Posts
    1,016

    Re: Questions to ponder during off season

    "Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?"

    Hey we don't want the dead walking around with diseases
    ;D.

  6. #6
    mr.woo's Avatar
    mr.woo is offline Team Alumni
    Join Date
    Dec 1969
    Posts
    3,213

    Re: Questions to ponder during off season

    why do we drive on a parkway and park on a drive way?
    woo out
    just two corn cobs shy of a bushel

  7. #7
    baumy300 is offline Star Spokesman
    Join Date
    Dec 1969
    Posts
    2,065

    Re: Questions to ponder during off season

    Why are there handicapped parking spaces at ice skating rinks?

  8. #8
    MetalMike-LoudVike's Avatar
    MetalMike-LoudVike is offline Hall of Famer
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    1,291

    Re: Questions to ponder during off season

    what in the name of thor is wrong with severly ugly chicks who wear Tshirts that say cutie?
    MMLV
    IN THE PITS ON THE RIVER BEDS EVRY VIKING FAN WILL RISE & VAHALLA SHALL REJOICE WITH THE MOST GLORIOUS PRIZE LOMBARDI'S TROPHY

  9. #9
    BadlandsVikings's Avatar
    BadlandsVikings is offline Jersey Retired
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    26,564

    Re: Questions to ponder during off season

    Where does the white go when the snow melts?

  10. #10
    Ltrey33 is offline Jersey Retired
    Join Date
    Dec 1969
    Posts
    8,618

    Re: Questions to ponder during off season

    Why do big sunglasses make ugly girls look cute?

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Ponder--The Scrambler II?
    By 61Vikefan in forum Vikings Fan Forum
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 09-04-2011, 10:45 AM
  2. Ponder did not have it easy
    By b_sandhar_29 in forum Vikings Fan Forum
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 06-05-2011, 01:13 AM
  3. Childress answers next season questions
    By COJOMAY in forum Vikings Fan Forum
    Replies: 118
    Last Post: 02-10-2008, 02:12 PM
  4. Something To Ponder!
    By sleepagent in forum Vikings Fan Forum
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 03-03-2006, 10:43 PM
  5. Something to Ponder (Tie Breakers)
    By Toss2Moss in forum Vikings Fan Forum
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 11-11-2003, 03:19 AM

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •