Official Joke Page

**FedjeViking** · 03-01-2006, 09:53 PM

"WBLVikeBabe" wrote:

hahah Fedje that is awesome!!!!

I'm fair, did one both ways--for guys, then us...but we won! :lol:

**WBLVikeBabe** · 03-01-2006, 09:56 PM

hahah yea, wasn't quite sure how it was going to end, but it ended the way it should be!

**FedjeViking** · 03-01-2006, 09:58 PM

"VikingNed" wrote:

Love it Fedje,

If you shake your mouse back and forth really fast, it does weird things...

I okay to shake my mouse, isn't it?......

Whatever 'trips your trigger' Ned! :lol:

**NodakPaul** · 03-01-2006, 09:59 PM

"FedjeViking" wrote:

Okay, you guys will like the screen cleaner at this link....

Edit *Nudity*

:sign5:

NOT work safe!

I don' t think the cleaning lady will ever talk to me again...

**FedjeViking** · 03-01-2006, 09:59 PM

"fabybaby32" wrote:

The Lone Ranger and Tonto stopped in the desert
> for the night. After they got their tent all set up, both men
fell
> sound asleep.
>
> Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger
> and says, "Kemo Sabe, look towards sky, what you see?"
>
> The Lone Ranger replies, "I see millions of stars."
>
> "What that tell you?" asked Tonto.
>
> The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says,
> "Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of
> galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically,
> it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to
> be approximately a quarter past three in the morning.
> Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and
> we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it
> seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.
> What's it tell you, Tonto?"
>
> Tonto is silent for a moment, then says, "Kemo
> Sabe, you dumber than buffalo pooh. It means
> someone stole tent."

:sign5: :sign5: I didn't expect that!

**Mr-holland** · 03-01-2006, 10:01 PM

Yo mama Is so poor if i ring the doorbell i hear a toilet-flush

**Mr-holland** · 03-01-2006, 10:01 PM

Yo mama is so poor, if i ring the doorbell she sais Ding-d0ng

**PurplePeopleEaters** · 03-01-2006, 10:03 PM

For the record, It's La Computadora :razz: :razz:

**FedjeViking** · 03-01-2006, 10:11 PM

Dog VS Cat!

As seen in a dog's diary:

7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mum! My favorite!
7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite!
8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite!
11pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite!

As seen in a cat's diary:

Day 183 of my captivity... My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.

The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction that I get from clawing their furniture.

Tomorrow I will eat another houseplant.

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded - must try this at the top of the stairs.

In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair. I must remember to try this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear in their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, that did not work according to plan...

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of inducing "allergies." I must learn what this is and how I may use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit.

The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I have patience, I can wait, it is only a matter of time...