Results 1 to 7 of 7
  1. #1
    BadlandsVikings's Avatar
    BadlandsVikings is offline Jersey Retired
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    26,572

    The Official Christmas Carol Thread

    Redneck 12 Days Of Christmas

    somebody dun gon to the Walmart
    man this the stuff i got for christmas
    well you cleand up what ya get
    5 flanle sherts
    4 big mut tires
    3 shot gun shells
    2 huntin dogs
    and some parts to a mustang gt
    thers twelve days of christmas
    i know that i got it covers look over there in the corner
    thats you stuff too!
    ya
    choris
    12 packs of bud
    11 reslen tickets
    10 a copinhagin
    9 years probation
    8 table dancers
    7 packs of red men
    6 packs of spam
    5 flanle sherts
    4 big mut tires
    3 shot gun shells
    2 huntin dogs
    and some parts to a mustang gt
    man this ant normle christmas presnts
    no ther redneck gifts
    redneck gifts
    ya like if you buy you wife a pair of earings that duble as fishins luers
    of you can berp the intier cours to jingle bells
    or if you think that the nut cracker is something you did of the hi dive
    or if youve ever mist spelled any thing in christmas lights
    or if you leave cold bear and pickeld eggs for santa claus
    whats rong with that
    i never sead there was something rong with it its just hard to beat

    Choris

    well you know you cant really call it a christmas unless you go down to the penitentery and visit your mamma
    your not lisenin to me get the care key out of your ear
    now im gunna do it for you again now listan

    Choris

  2. #2
    mnjamie's Avatar
    mnjamie is offline Ring of Fame
    Join Date
    Dec 1969
    Posts
    3,536

    Re: The Official Christmas Carol Thread

    To damn early for x-mas stuff... wait another 2 weeks.


    :-X

  3. #3
    VKG4LFE's Avatar
    VKG4LFE is offline Jersey Retired Tetris Champion, Monkey GO Happy 4 Champion
    Join Date
    Dec 1969
    Location
    Hartford, WI
    Posts
    16,013

    Re: The Official Christmas Carol Thread

    Too early! It's never too early for xmas stuff!!

    I get the most pissed off looks from people with my VKG 4 LFE Wisconsin license plate, and I LOVE IT!!

  4. #4
    marcosMN is offline Star Spokesman
    Join Date
    Dec 1969
    Location
    Mpls, MN
    Posts
    2,097

    Re: The Official Christmas Carol Thread

    Feliz Navidad.

    Feliz Navidad.

    Prospero ano y felizidad.

    :P
    -Sno

  5. #5
    josdin00's Avatar
    josdin00 is offline Ring of Fame
    Join Date
    Dec 1969
    Posts
    3,619

    Re: The Official Christmas Carol Thread

    Okay, everyone's been asking for it, so here it is, our Twelve Days Of Christmas. We're gonna sing it now...

    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Okay, good day, this is our Christmas part of the album, and you can play this at your Christmas parties, uh, or to yourself on Christmas Eve, if there's nothing else to do.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Good day, eh? In case you thought, like, I wasn't on this part!
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Oh, I guarantee ya, you'd be on. Okay, so, good day, this is the Christmas part, and, we're gonna tell you what to get, uh, your true love for Christmas.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Look out the window!
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Where?! Whadda ya doing?
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Snow, hosehead.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Wha? Oh, it's the Great White North, and it's snowing, cause it's Christmas time. Hey, hoser!
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] What?
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Here's a quiz. Quiz for Doug.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Okay, I have my thinking touque on.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Yeah, right. What are the twelve days of Christmas? Cause, figure it out, right. Christmas is when?
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Uh, the 25th.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Right, and what's the 24th, Christmas Eve, right? So, that's two. And then, what's after that?
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Um... Uh, Wrestling Day.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] No. Get out.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Boxing Day, yeah, yeah.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] That's three. Then what's after that? Nothing.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] New Year's.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Four. And what's...
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] New Year's Eve.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Five. Where do you get twelve?
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Uh... There's two Saturdays and Sundays in there, that's four. That's nine. And, three other days, which I believe are the mystery days.
    (Music starts.)
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Okay now. This is our Christmas song, in case you don't know what to get somebody for Christmas.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] There's lots of ideas in here, so, listen, and don't get stuck.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Okay.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] By the way, that's me on the organ.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Aw, geez.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] You start.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Okay. On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: a beer.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: two turtlenecks,
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] And a beer. (Okay...) On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: three French toast,
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Two turtlenecks,
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] And a beer. (Okay...)
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] There should be more there, eh?
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Where? On the... go.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: four pounds of backbacon,
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Three French toast,
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Two turtlenecks,
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] And a beer.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] In a tree. See, you need more.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: five golden touques!
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Four pounds of backbacon,
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Three French toast,
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Two turtlenecks,
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] And a beer, what was it?
    Together In a tree!
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Okay, on the sixth... go.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Of Christmas, my true love gave to me: six packs of two-four,
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] & BG Singers Five golden touques!
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Four pounds of backbacon,
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Three French toast,
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Two turtlenecks,
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] And a beer,
    Together In a tree!
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Okay.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Okay.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: seven packs of smokes,
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] (Nice gift...) Oh, six packs of two-four! (BG Singers also sing "nice gift".)
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] & BG Singers Five golden touques!
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Four pounds of backbacon,
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Three French toast,
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Two turtlenecks,
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] And a beer,
    Together In a tree!
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Right, I keep forgetting.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Phew! This should just be the two days of Christmas, it's too hard for us!
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Um...
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Go, hoser.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Oh.
    Together Eigth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Eight comic books,
    All Seven packs of smokes, six packs of two-four,
    ([glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] and [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] become unsynchronized with the BG Singers, and quit singing.)
    BG Singers Five golden touques! Four pounds of backbacon, three French toast, two turtlenecks,
    All And a beer,
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] On my tree!
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Yeah. That beer's empty. Okay. Day,
    BG Singers Twelve!
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Uh, twelve.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Good day, and welcome to day twelve.
    BG Singers Five golden touques!
    All Four pounds of backbacon, three French toast, two turtlenecks, and a beer, in a tree!
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Beauty, eh?
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Where'd you learn to do that?
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Uh, albums.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Boy. So, like, that's our song, Merry Christmas...
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Merry Christmas!
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] And good day!
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Good day, everybody. Happy New Year, too. Sheesh. Okay, you know what you left out?
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] What?
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Donuts - I told you to get me donuts! Either on the ninth day or the tenth day, or the eleventh day, I wanted donuts!
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Okay, the song's over.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] But I want...
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Merry Christmas, everybody!
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Or on the twelfth day, you coulda got me a dozen donuts.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] So, go out to the stores, and get some presents.
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] You coulda gone down to, like, the good donut shop, where if you buy a dozen, you get another one free, and then thirteen for the thirteen days of Christmas.
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Well, next Christmas, I'll get me a chainsaw...
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Take off!
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Boy, that song was a beauty. It moved me...
    [glow=red,2,300]Bob[/glow] Yeah, I think it ranks up there with Stairway to Heaven...
    [glow=green,2,300]Doug[/glow] Wha-?
    (Music fades.)

  6. #6
    BadlandsVikings's Avatar
    BadlandsVikings is offline Jersey Retired
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    26,572

    Re: The Official Christmas Carol Thread

    I saw Daddy kissing Santa Claus


    I saw Daddy kissing Santa Claus

    Underneath the mistletoe last night

    He didn't see me creep

    Down the stairs to have a peep

    He thought that I was tucked up in my bedroom fast asleep

    Then I saw Daddy tickle Santa Claus

    Underneath his beard so snowy white

    There must be some mistake

    Was I really awake?

    I rubbed my eyes and moved in close, a better look to take'

    Then I saw Daddy hugging Santa Claus

    He took his hand and moved him to the couch

    It must have been just fine

    Santa didn't seem to mind

    Then Daddy moved across the room to pour them both some wine

    Then I saw Daddy tickle Santa Claus

    Underneath his beard so snowy white

    There must be some mistake

    Was I really awake?

    I rubbed my eyes and moved in close, a better look to take'

    Then I saw Daddy fondle Santa Claus

    And on his ear he nibbled now and then

    I crawled across the floor

    I hid behind the door

    I left it open just a crack so I can watch some more

    Then I saw Daddy undress Santa Claus

    They quickly threw their clothes on our big chair

    Well, much to my surprise

    I couldn't believe my eyes

    It wasn't Santa after all but Mommy in disguise!

    When I saw Daddy kissing Santa Claus

    Underneath the mistletoe last night

    Oh, what a laugh it would have been

    If I had REALLY seen

    Daddy kissing Santa Claus last night!

  7. #7
    BadlandsVikings's Avatar
    BadlandsVikings is offline Jersey Retired
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    26,572

    Re: The Official Christmas Carol Thread

    Tree's On Fire
    (same tune as Ring Of Fire)

    June
    Wake up June
    The tree's on fire June
    Ohhh noooo

    Love is a Christmas tree
    But don't think any old tree is safe
    Some have a long expire
    Turn your house into a funeral pyre

    And I watered that tree
    Till the branches rose up higher
    And it drank drank drank
    But it kept on getting drier
    Now it burns burns burns
    This tree's on fire
    This tree's on fire

    June call 9-1-1
    June
    Ohhh

    The heat from the smokin' pine
    Melted my copy of Walk The Line
    And I tried to save A Boy Named Sue
    Dang it cooked him too

    The cat walked in
    Set my Christmas tree on fire
    He climbed climbed climbed
    Hit some bulbs
    And stripped the wires
    Meows)
    :That's when I learned learned learned
    This tree's on fire
    This tree's on fire

    Damn cats

    I go into my Christmas tree of fire
    And I huffed and huffed and spit
    But the flames would not expire
    Boy it burns burns burns
    This tree's on fire
    This tree's on fire

    Blow June blow
    Oh keep blowing June

Similar Threads

  1. OFFICIAL Christmas is nutsacks thread.
    By The Dropper in forum Post Wasteland
    Replies: 40
    Last Post: 01-07-2009, 11:32 AM
  2. Packer's Christmas Carol
    By vikinggreg in forum Trash the Pack
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 12-15-2006, 11:19 PM
  3. OFFICIAL VIKINGS CHRISTMAS GAME TAILGATE THREAD!!!
    By cajunvike in forum Vikings Fan Forum
    Replies: 40
    Last Post: 12-28-2005, 08:16 AM
  4. The Official Merry Christmas thread...
    By shockzilla in forum The Clubhouse
    Replies: 32
    Last Post: 12-25-2005, 08:43 PM
  5. A christmas Carol
    By HarrisonB57 in forum Vikings Fan Forum
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 12-24-2004, 10:55 PM

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •