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  1. #1
    Prophet's Avatar
    Prophet is offline Jersey Retired
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    Meat is Murder: The Payback.

    Many of you remember last year when Del Rio was burnt on a prank at work.
    It is time to get even.
    He has tentatively agreed to implement a plan if we come up with one, as long as it doesn't involve disfigurement of the beauty that burnt him.

    Read these threads to updtate yourself on the situation:

    Meat is Murder

    Del, Finish your post

    There may be another thread called 'Meat is Murder II', but I can't seem to find it.

    So, we need to collectively come up with a plan for retaliation.
    Post your ideas and we'll synthesize a plan that Del Rio will implement and document for our offseason enjoyment.
    Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. Mark Twain

  2. #2
    Marrdro's Avatar
    Marrdro is offline Beware My Spreadsheet, Bitches!
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    Re: Meat is Murder: The Payback.

    That was a heck of a long read but WELL worth it.
    It will be hard to top and will require some thinking.
    Many many thanks to my talented friend Jos for the new Sig.http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v343/josdin00/Vikings/Marrdro_sig.jpg

  3. #3
    snowinapril's Avatar
    snowinapril is offline Jersey Retired
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    Re: Meat is Murder: The Payback.

    Have Del wear assless chaps around the office on spanish omlette day.

    I only put 30 seconds into that plan, I will take my time and see if I can figure out something to top that.
    But I think it will be difficult to top that.

  4. #4
    Zeus's Avatar
    Zeus is offline Jersey Retired
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    Re: Meat is Murder: The Payback.

    "Acumen" wrote:
    Many of you remember last year when Del Rio was burnt on a prank at work.
    It is time to get even.
    He has tentatively agreed to implement a plan if we come up with one, as long as it doesn't involve disfigurement of the beauty that burnt him.

    Read these threads to updtate yourself on the situation:

    Meat is Murder

    Del, Finish your post

    There may be another thread called 'Meat is Murder II', but I can't seem to find it.

    So, we need to collectively come up with a plan for retaliation.
    Post your ideas and we'll synthesize a plan that Del Rio will implement and document for our offseason enjoyment.
    25 pages in those 2 threads and NOT ONE picture of the hot veggie girl.

    Harumph.

    =Z=

    Thanks to Josdin for the awesome sig!

  5. #5
    Prophet's Avatar
    Prophet is offline Jersey Retired
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    Re: Meat is Murder: The Payback.

    [size=14pt]Ok, some of the details were worked out in the beserker.
    Del & Cog, correct me if this is incorrect.

    In the original prank, Peta Girl, was a pawn in the action.
    The boss was the brainchild.

    The prank will involve three characters:

    Del Rio
    Peta Girl
    Ballistic Man

    Ballistic man can be used indirectly in the prank using his personality trait.
    He cannot know about the prank, but he can be integrated into the prank by utilizing his ballistic qualities.


    and be directed toward the boss.

    Del, fill us in on any details we need to know in order to develop this.[/size]

    Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. Mark Twain

  6. #6
    Del Rio Guest

    Re: Meat is Murder: The Payback.

    "AWZeus" wrote:
    "Acumen" wrote:
    Many of you remember last year when Del Rio was burnt on a prank at work.
    It is time to get even.
    He has tentatively agreed to implement a plan if we come up with one, as long as it doesn't involve disfigurement of the beauty that burnt him.

    Read these threads to updtate yourself on the situation:

    Meat is Murder

    Del, Finish your post

    There may be another thread called 'Meat is Murder II', but I can't seem to find it.

    So, we need to collectively come up with a plan for retaliation.
    Post your ideas and we'll synthesize a plan that Del Rio will implement and document for our offseason enjoyment.
    25 pages in those 2 threads and NOT ONE picture of the hot veggie girl.

    Harumph.

    =Z=
    I can't even have a cell phone in my area, let alone a camera.

  7. #7
    cogitans is offline Jersey Retired
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    Re: Meat is Murder: The Payback.

    Remember people that this can be twisted and turned in any direction. So don't be affraid to toss out ideas.

    Thanks to PPE for the sig.

  8. #8
    Zeus's Avatar
    Zeus is offline Jersey Retired
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    Re: Meat is Murder: The Payback.

    "Del" wrote:
    "AWZeus" wrote:
    "Acumen" wrote:
    Many of you remember last year when Del Rio was burnt on a prank at work.
    It is time to get even.
    He has tentatively agreed to implement a plan if we come up with one, as long as it doesn't involve disfigurement of the beauty that burnt him.

    Read these threads to updtate yourself on the situation:

    Meat is Murder

    Del, Finish your post

    There may be another thread called 'Meat is Murder II', but I can't seem to find it.

    So, we need to collectively come up with a plan for retaliation.
    Post your ideas and we'll synthesize a plan that Del Rio will implement and document for our offseason enjoyment.
    25 pages in those 2 threads and NOT ONE picture of the hot veggie girl.

    Harumph.

    =Z=
    I can't even have a cell phone in my area, let alone a camera.
    That's why God invented after-work office happy hours.

    =Z=

    Thanks to Josdin for the awesome sig!

  9. #9
    Del Rio Guest

    Re: Meat is Murder: The Payback.

    Alright guys and gals, apparently it is time to get revenge. If you didn’t want to read the two incredibly long threads posted above to summarize I had a prank played on me that was laid out and executed to perfection. It has been almost a year and it is now time to figure out how to get revenge. There are a few people who I work with that I am going to profile for you now,
    first off my Boss is the one who wanted to get me. So when Peta girl was hired he talked to her about it and they involved the whole office and burned me good.

    So we have my boss, who was the birth giver. We have Peta Girl who was the hand of justice, and we have MIKE, who is Mike? Well Mike is a guy that works with me who has had some problems in his life, I know for some alcoholism is a sensitive issue so I will not go into details too much but due to Mikes drinking and probably more likely his drug use he has become quite the character. The intention of this Profile is to help you get a better understanding of the situation and who we have to work with. Mike is going to be the best read but I am going to start with my Boss.



    1. Boss: Well lets see here, the guy is very laid back. About the only way I could piss him off is to talk crap on his family (Which I would never do) or talk crap on NASCAR, which I do everyday. He drives a lifted 2006 F-150 that is his baby. He is as close to a cowboy as you can get. He has a small ranch that I have worked on in the past, and will do so again shortly. So there are opportunities for out of work activities. My father shoes his horses so that is another angle. He doesn’t watch football; he doesn’t watch any sport but NASCAR. He is also rarely here, always in meetings and training courses. Not much else to say. He loves country music.


    2. PETA GIRL: Ok well this girl has a tendency to talk to me about everything, and yet I know very little about who she really is. I do have a few stories that can be shared at her expense which I have no problem doing for the good of the clan. First story is she was dating a guy that went to Mexico on spring break. Well he purchased a lot of Oxycotin and decided he was going to sell it in America or use it who knows. Well on his way back to America he got caught at the border on the Mexican side of the fence and ended up in Mexican prison. End of relationship right? WRONG, she dedicates the next 5 months of her life to driving down to the prison and giving him her paycheck so he can buy food, buy some peace and quiet, and buy an un-bruised brown eye. When she would visit him she would get felt up by the guards, harassed, the whole Nuevo Yardo……so he was actually sentenced to life. The jail filled up and they kicked him to the border after half a year. She goes and gets him and in three days he breaks up with her.

    One day I am filing paperwork, she comes up to me and whispers hey I want to ask you something. Could this be her asking me if she can come visit me and the wife for a night of experimentation? No it was her asking me if her new boyfriends lack of girth was normal. Now everyone feel free to come up with your own conclusions as to why she chose me, but let me just say this for some reason she tells me everything. Turns out she is dating the pepsi vendor guy. The guy that fills the pepsi machine. It also turns out nature has played a cruel trick on him and he resembles a couple #2 pencils. Which has landed him the name Pencil Dick. She said she really loved him and he was a great guy. She broke up with him 2 days later, he still works there. He could help us if needed. Or could be involved somehow.

    Last dating story, she dated my friend. She dumped him because he used a spoon to twirl his spaghetti onto his fork and she though that was weird. So probably not the brightest crayon in the box.


    3. MIKE: Ok this guy is the epitome of arsehole. He has no sense of boundaries and is about as stable as a house of cards. Words cannot describe the event that is MIKE. So I will try my best giving a few examples. We were having a POT LUCK, one of my coworkers (a woman) was at the front of the line. She is a heavy woman. Mike is behind me in line and I can hear him getting impatient. He does the sigh thing and the foot shuffle thing and then all of a sudden he YELLS out “OK FAT ARSE, I think you have had enough time. Leave some for the rest of us, move along you have done enough DAMAGE!” ok I know some of you are very sensitive and I felt for her and because of that I did not laugh……on the outside.

    Example 2: Again food related, we are eating pizza and it is our first day on the job. Mike takes a bite of pizza and a big string of cheese is hanging from his face, a coworker tells him about it and he goes off, I mean swearing, throwing pizza, pushing the kid………

    Example 3: On valentines day we had someone die at work. An older man was working with me and he sat down and held his chest. I called 911, and no sooner had I dialed he started spitting blood everywhere. Me and another guy grab him bring him to a table and lay him on it over some coats. Boss has the deliberator and it does not good. The guy dies an ugly death blood all over, spasms, gurgling, in front of everyone. His body sat there for 12 hours while they investigated (I work for the Gov), the next day we were given off. The day after we had a large group counsel session, some girl was saying she was having nightmares and a few other people agreed. Mike gets up and starts yelling about how death is for the weak and only a pussy would be bothered by it. He goes on to tell everyone he has seen friends die far worse deaths.

    This guy has done this stuff everyday he has been here. He drank cologne in his 20’s because he was selling it for booze money and decided to drink it instead. He is not all there. He must be utilized somehow.

  10. #10
    poult is offline Asst. Coach
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    Re: Meat is Murder: The Payback.

    yeesh, good to know the government has hign enough standards to hire people like mike.
    how the hell does that guy still have his job??
    "the only diffrence between suicide and martyrdom is the press coverage"
    Tender Branson

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