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Thread: Meat is Murder

  1. #1
    Del Rio Guest

    Meat is Murder

    Or so I was just done being told by a new co-worker.

    She came to work wearing a shirt that says Meat is Murder. She got the cube next to me.

    So I'm sitting there drawing and I feel the creepy sensation someone is watching me. Ok, no big deal I'm a fine specimin for eye rape so have at it baby......oh wait! It's meat murder chick...........

    I notice she is looking at my many pictures of dead animals scattered throughout my cube. I ask her if she likes the decor, she sighs and rolls her ass back to her cube.

    At this point I am feeling somewhat uncomfortable. I mean I am a smart ass, and this is seriously going to lead to some great opportunities to exercise my skills. So I figure as long as she doesn't cross the line I will try my best to respect her beliefs. I celebrate my grown up decision by getting me a grilled steak burrito from Taco Bell. So I'm sitting at my desk feeling my ass get bigger as I down this 700 Calorie protien monstrosity and it occurs to me I am being watched yet again be Mrs. Peta herself.

    She speaks! "Could you please eat your carcass in the break room it's making me sick?"

    So I ask her if she just told me to eat myself? She doesn't get it, I explain that she told me to eat my carcass and that if she was refering to the cow carcass I was munching on to refer to him as bob, because he's into it.

    So she is very confused and so am I because I have no clue wtf I just said. it sounded good at the time. I continue to eat.....

    I am open for suggestions. I will update after trying suggestions so please feel free to use this thread as comic relief.

  2. #2
    Prophet Guest

    Re: Meat is Murder

    LMAO, what a nightmare.

    Ask her if she is a member of PETA and send her this website: PETA. That should get you off to a good start.

    I worked with someone like that once and took her hunting with me and now she understands it and thinks it's fun. She still is a vegan, but at least she understands why I like to hunt.

    She seems a little pushy for her first day on the job.

    Have fun with it and I'm looking forward to the updates.

  3. #3
    tarkenton10's Avatar
    tarkenton10 is online now Star Spokesman
    Join Date
    Dec 1969

    Re: Meat is Murder

    Is she afraid that she is going to be harpooned or something. Maybe there is way too much corn in her fodder? I would wear a sign that says lettuce has feelings too. I would wear a shirt that said Save the lettuce eat a Cow!!! If you have a picture of a woman that fits her description get that printed on a shirt!!!!! I would have fun with her, talk about going on an expedition to smash baby fur seals heads!! Or harpooning some endangered species of whale!!

    There s only two things stopping you - fear and common sense!! The Truth you CAN"T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!!!!!!!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 1969

    Re: Meat is Murder

    yeah i hate that, people are so onesided and think they are right

    if theyd just look at the whole picture hunting helps, helos keep animals from over population, which can cuz under nurishment and malnutirtion, making them die painful deaths, hunting keeps numbers under control, OH YEAH and its a lot of fun
    Can Someone please Hook me up with a Sig

  5. #5
    Prophet Guest

    Re: Meat is Murder

    Is she wearing any leather? Does she live in a wooden house? Does she drive a gas guzzler? Is she a hypocrite?

  6. #6
    Del Rio Guest

    Re: Meat is Murder

    She has hemp jewelry from the looks of it.

    I guess for those who don't know I work for the government, she isn't EXACTLY new, she is new to my area she has been a gov employee for 5 years so she is set in stone, basically takes an act of congress to fire you after a year.

    So people generally tell you how they feel around here without worrying about any backlash.

    I have no idea what she is wearing, it isn't leather thank god. I need to sneak a digital camera in here to document this properly.

  7. #7
    DEEP PURPLE's Avatar
    DEEP PURPLE is offline Starter
    Join Date
    Dec 1969

    Re: Meat is Murder

    I know for a fact (because one of my buddies has one) that someone makes a shirt that says "Save a Cow Eat a Vegitarian" that might ruffle her brussel sprouts a bit. Also If you do find one of those shirts I would like you to were it to work and when you do, have someone follow you with a camera so we can get a great picture of her reaction the first time she sees it. Thanks

    If I hear Michelle Bonner say "He works that one to right" one more time, I m getting on a plane for Bristol, going to the ESPNEWS set, and ripping out her vocal cords.

  8. #8
    Prophet Guest

    Re: Meat is Murder

    Troll or looker or inbetween?

  9. #9
    BirdHunter's Avatar
    BirdHunter is offline Starter
    Join Date
    Dec 1969

    Re: Meat is Murder

    You should go to your local sporting goods store (i.e. Gander Mt. or Fleet farm) and find the "Buck Wear" t-shirt that says " There is a place for all of God's creatures..... Right next to the mashed potatoes and gravy" and proudly wear it to work. That should help the situation with the hippy tree-hugger.

    Friendship is like pissing your pants...
    Everyone can see it,
    But only you can feel its true warmth!!!

  10. #10
    Del Rio Guest

    Re: Meat is Murder

    She is actually pretty good looking. She's not a big girl by any means, I'd say she is 5'8 or so and size: skinny

    She almost looks goth though, like an emo/goth/vegetarian.

    She seems to hate men too, Of course she is one of two women who work in my area and the other girl is as bad as us guys.

    I will try to get a camera in here Monday and get this rolling.

    I will find me a T-shirt or something over the weekend to wear on monday. Maybe I will show up in my blaze orange and hunting vest?

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