Results 1 to 5 of 5
  1. #1
    Prophet's Avatar
    Prophet is offline Jersey Retired
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    17,388

    Matt Leinart Disappointed To Find That 10-Month-Old Son Is A Terrible Wing Man

    [size=12pt]Matt Leinart Disappointed To Find That 10-Month-Old Son Is A Terrible Wing Man[/size]
    [size=1pt]Disclaimer: If you are so retarded that you think this is a real article when there is a link to the original article and it is posted in the clubhouse you should consider getting a job making hamburgers the apex of your careers.[/size]



    Just days after reaching a custody agreement with the mother of his 10-month-old son, Matt Leinart has told friends that he is extremely disappointed with his child’s abilities to function as a capable wing man at clubs.

    “Matt says having the kid around has really cramped his style with the ladies,” said Arizona Cardinals teammate Edgerrin James. “He had the kid out at the club last night, and every time he set it down on the bar to go dance with some girl, the kid would start wailing and crying or fall off the bar onto the floor. Turns out the thing can’t even walk. And neither could Matt either by night’s end. Like father, like son, as the saying goes.”

    Leinart has been accused of not being active in his son’s life by the boy’s mother, USC women’s basketball player Brynn Cameron. But the former USC quarterback says Cameron has ruined his son by not raising him properly.

    “I don’t want to take it out on him, because I know it’s mainly due to the failings of his mother, but that child has no manners. It’s impossible to go out in public with him,” said Leinart. “Last night I was talking to these two girls, smelling all fresh with my cologne on, and he goes and takes a huge dump in his pants. Stunk them right away. And then the waitress got all pissed when I asked her to change his diaper. Told her I would even tip her for my drinks if she did it, but no.”

    Cameron says last night’s escapades prove that Leinart is an unfit father.

    “I told Matt that 7:30 is the baby’s bedtime,” said Cameron. “But he kept him out until 5:30 in the morning. And expected him to be his designated driver, too. I asked Matt what he fed the baby for dinner and he said: ‘I think he ate some bar peanuts. And there was some stuff he ate off the floor. Sequins, mainly.’"

    Leinart says that sort of thing is not really his role as a father, however.

    “I don’t do bed times or eating or stuff like that,” said the quarterback. “I let Brynn handle that sort of thing. Or I figure he’s 10 months now – he can watch out for himself. You know, be a man. I’m more of the fun dad. Taking him out to clubs. Letting him meet Paris Hilton, Britney Spears. Stuff like that. Heck, Britney wanted to hook up with him. Said he reminded her of her son. But he blew it by crying non-stop. Britney said it gave her a headache ‘cause of all the drugs.”

    No matter what, Leinart says his 10-month-old son is going to have to start pulling his weight a bit more at clubs if he wants to spend more time with his father.

    “At the end of the day, the question is: ‘Does the baby want to have a half-sister or half-brother to play with?’” said Leinart. “Then he needs to help me pick up some hottie to impregnate. And he better not try to breastfeed off of her like he did last night when I was hooking up with that chick in the bathroom stall. I’ve done three-ways before, but that was kind of weird.”
    Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. Mark Twain

  2. #2
    NodakPaul's Avatar
    NodakPaul is offline Jersey Retired
    Join Date
    Dec 1969
    Location
    West Fargo, ND
    Posts
    17,601
    Blog Entries
    1

    Re: Matt Leinart Disappointed To Find That 10-Month-Old Son Is A Terrible Wing Man

    Matt says having the kid around has really cramped his style with the ladies
    Now you see, that just isn't true.
    Chicks are drawn to guys with children like iron shavings to a magnet.
    When my daughter was born we lived on a college campus.
    I would take her for walks in the stroller, and I couldn't pass a group of girls without them oohing and ahhing over her. ;D
    Zeus wrote:
    When are you going to realize that picking out the 20 bad throws this year and ignoring the 300 good ones does not make your point?

    =Z=

  3. #3
    Prophet's Avatar
    Prophet is offline Jersey Retired
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    17,388

    Re: Matt Leinart Disappointed To Find That 10-Month-Old Son Is A Terrible Wing Man

    "NodakPaul" wrote:
    Matt says having the kid around has really cramped his style with the ladies
    Now you see, that just isn't true.
    Chicks are drawn to guys with children like iron shavings to a magnet.
    When my daughter was born we lived on a college campus.
    I would take her for walks in the stroller, and I couldn't pass a group of girls without them oohing and ahhing over her. ;D
    It's easier to get a puppy.
    Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. Mark Twain

  4. #4
    Zeus's Avatar
    Zeus is offline Jersey Retired
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Minnesota.
    Posts
    23,937

    Re: Matt Leinart Disappointed To Find That 10-Month-Old Son Is A Terrible Wing Man

    “Matt says having the kid around has really cramped his style with the ladies,” said Arizona Cardinals teammate Edgerrin James. “He had the kid out at the club last night, and every time he set it down on the bar to go dance with some girl, the kid would start wailing and crying or fall off the bar onto the floor. Turns out the thing can’t even walk. And neither could Matt either by night’s end. Like father, like son, as the saying goes.”
    You didn't include the right picture from the story, dude....



    =Z=

    Thanks to Josdin for the awesome sig!

  5. #5
    BadlandsVikings's Avatar
    BadlandsVikings is offline Jersey Retired
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    26,564

    Re: Matt Leinart Disappointed To Find That 10-Month-Old Son Is A Terrible Wing Man

    If he would have used the new onion condom he wouldn't have to worry about things like this.

Similar Threads

  1. ESPN INsider: Vikings should pursue Vince Young or Matt Leinart...
    By TrojanVike28 in forum General NFL Discussion
    Replies: 44
    Last Post: 03-23-2009, 11:58 AM
  2. Wing Bowl 17
    By gr8vike in forum Two Beer Minimum
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 02-07-2009, 12:06 PM
  3. MOVED: Wing Bowl 17
    By ultravikingfan in forum The Clubhouse
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 02-05-2009, 12:25 PM
  4. Matt Leinart is a loser
    By singersp in forum General NFL Discussion
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 09-01-2008, 08:09 AM
  5. Replies: 0
    Last Post: 07-31-2008, 07:29 AM

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •