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  1. #481
    FedjeViking is offline Ring of Fame
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    "cajunvike" wrote:
    The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?"

    The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"

    The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"

    The graduate with an History/Computers degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"
    And...

    The graduate with a Law degree asks, "Is there a law against it, or can I sue?"
    [move]"Our day WILL come!! I just hope I LIVE long enough to see it!"[/move]

  2. #482
    cajunvike's Avatar
    cajunvike is offline Jersey Retired
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    "FedjeViking" wrote:
    "cajunvike" wrote:
    The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?"

    The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"

    The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"

    The graduate with an History/Computers degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"
    And...

    The graduate with a Law degree asks, "Is there a law against it, or can I sue?"
    And LAUGHS all the way to the bank!!! :evil4:
    BANNED OR DEAD...I'LL TAKE EITHER ONE

  3. #483
    FedjeViking is offline Ring of Fame
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    Brain Store

    A man went to a brain store to get some brain for dinner.
    He sees a sign remarking on the quality of proffesional brain
    offerred at this particular brain store. So he asks the butcher:
    "How much for Engineer brain?"
    "3 dollars an ounce."
    "How much for brain?"
    "4 dollars an ounce."
    "How much for lawyer brain?"
    "100 dollars an ounce."
    "Why is lawyer brain so much more?"
    "Do you know how many lawyers you need to kill to get one ounce of brain?"
    [move]"Our day WILL come!! I just hope I LIVE long enough to see it!"[/move]

  4. #484
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    Since you're on the subject of lawyers...

    A lawyer was driving his big BMW down the highway, singing to himself, "I love my BMW, I love my BMW." Focusing on his car, not his driving, he smashed into a tree. He miraculously survived, but his car was totaled. "My BMW! My BMW!" he sobbed.

    A good Samaritan drove by and cried out, "Sir, sir, you're bleeding! And my god, your left arm is gone!"

    The lawyer, horrified, screamed "My Rolex! My Rolex!"

    I'm exercising my ass by doing flexing exercises while typing. Prophet 3:42pm March 16, 2007
    "If God had wanted man to play soccer, he wouldn't have given us arms." Mike Ditka

  5. #485
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    A barber gave a haircut to a priest one day. The priest tried to pay for the haircut, but the barber refused, saying, "you do God’s work." The next morning the barber found a dozen bibles at the door to his shop.

    A policeman came to the barber for a haircut, and again the barber refused payment, saying, "you protect the public." The next morning the barber found a dozen doughnuts at the door to his shop.

    A lawyer came to the barber for a haircut, and again the barber refused payment, saying, "you serve the justice system." The next morning the barber found a dozen lawyers waiting for a free haircut.

    I'm exercising my ass by doing flexing exercises while typing. Prophet 3:42pm March 16, 2007
    "If God had wanted man to play soccer, he wouldn't have given us arms." Mike Ditka

  6. #486
    marcosMN is offline Star Spokesman
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    A new doctor is doing his rounds at a nursing home.

    He walks in on an old man furiously pleasuring himself.

    He runs to the nurses station and informs the on-duty nurse.

    She replies, "its a condition he has. He must do that 3 times daily or he could die."

    The doc shrugs it off and continues his rounds. A few doors down, he walks in on another old man, this one being pleasured by a nurse!

    He dashes back to the head nurse and explaines what he saw.

    She laughs and says, "same disorder, better insurance."

    x
    -Sno

  7. #487
    BadlandsVikings's Avatar
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    Stop redundancy

    The Committee for the Reduction of Redundancy and the Antiproliferation of Repetition has decided not to meet until they have their first meeting and thus will not be meeting until the first time.

    Their Pre-meeting Statement wanted to make this clear before they had their first meeting, so that it would not be unor confusing.

    So their first meeting will actually be their first meeting and they will not have a meeting before the first meeting.

    This should avoid having people show up for their first meeting before it is held, since to do so would be confusing to those who did so and this is what they want to avoid by reducing the confusion and lessening the repetition.

  8. #488
    purplehorn is offline Hall of Famer
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    "cajunvike" wrote:
    "purplehorn" wrote:
    !"
    Welcome back, purplehorn...long time no see (on the board that is)!

    Look forward to your contributions to the board this season! :grin:
    [size=9px][/size]

    Thanks Rajun Cajun. I moved the family to Wyoming took 9 months
    off work. FINALLY got wild blue satelite Internet and glad to be back
    amongst the Purple Brethren. GO VIKES
    Green Bay police station toilet stolen.

    Cops say they have nothing to go on.

  9. #489
    BadlandsVikings's Avatar
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    Tell the whole truth

    `You seem to be in some distress,' said the kindly judge to the witness. `Is anything the matter?'

    `Well, your Honour,' said the witness, `I swore to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, but every time I try, some lawyer objects.'

  10. #490
    cajunvike's Avatar
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    "purplehorn" wrote:
    "cajunvike" wrote:
    "purplehorn" wrote:
    !"
    Welcome back, purplehorn...long time no see (on the board that is)!

    Look forward to your contributions to the board this season! :grin:
    [size=9px][/size]

    Thanks Rajun Cajun. I moved the family to Wyoming took 9 months
    off work. FINALLY got wild blue satelite Internet and glad to be back
    amongst the Purple Brethren. GO VIKES
    Man, that must be a big switch for you....what occasioned the move?

    My brother-in-law was working out in Rock Springs for quite awhile...he works for an oil outfit called Patterson Rental Tools.
    BANNED OR DEAD...I'LL TAKE EITHER ONE

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