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  1. #1981
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    [img width=450 height=297]http://lesterslegends.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/Cash-for-Clunkers.jpg[/img]

  2. #1982
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    Re: Official Joke Page II


  3. #1983
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    Who is the greatest prostitute in history?

    Ms. Pacman.
    For 25 cents she will swallow balls until she dies.
    "There are 3 things that sell in America:
    Violence, sex, and drugs.
    The only way you are going to make this game more appealing to the public than it was before is if there are on field orgies at halftime and the domes become massive opium dens."

    [img width=450 height=55]http://img216.imageshac

  4. #1984
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    Re: Official Joke Page II

    Green Bay Packers

  5. #1985
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    Re:Official Joke Page II

    How do you make Lady Gaga really angry?

    Poker Face

  6. #1986
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    Re:Official Joke Page II

    Lena was complaining about her breasts being too small.
    She said to Ole
    "I tink I need dat breast enlargement. Dee's tits are too small ya know."

    Ole said "Ya know we can't afford dat. I know a better way Lena. Take a piece of toilet tissue and rub it up and down between your boobs. Just keep rubbing between dem and before ya know it, your boobs will be bigger."

    "Oh Ole, I don't know how dat is gonna make my boobs any bigger."

    "Well," Ole said, "It sure worked for your ass......"

  7. #1987
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    Marrdro is offline Beware My Spreadsheet, Bitches!
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    Re:Official Joke Page II

    A U.S. Navy captain was about to start the morning briefing to his staff. While waiting for the coffee machine to finish its brewing, the captain decided to pose a question to all assembled.


    He explained that his wife had been a bit frisky the night before and he failed to get his usual amount of sound sleep.

    He posed the question of just how much of sex was "work" and how much of it was "pleasure?"

    A commander chimed in with 75-25% in favor of work.

    A lieutenant said it was 50-50%.

    An ensign responded with 25-75% in favor of pleasure, depending upon his state of inebriation at the time.

    There being no consensus, the captain turned to the seaman who was in charge of making the coffee. What was HIS opinion?


    Without any hesitation, the young seaman responded, "Sir, it has to be 100% pleasure."

    The captain was surprised and, as you might guess, asked why?

    "Well, sir, if there was any work involved, the officers would have me doing it for them."


    The room fell silent.

    God bless the enlisted man!
    Many many thanks to my talented friend Jos for the new Sig.http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v343/josdin00/Vikings/Marrdro_sig.jpg

  8. #1988
    VikingMike's Avatar
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    Re:Official Joke Page II

    A special Fairy Tale just for men...




    Once upon a time, a handsome Prince asked a beautiful Princess..."Will you marry me?"


    The Princess said, "No!"


    And the Prince lived happily ever after, and rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf and drank beer and scotch and had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted.

    The End
    Any man who afflicts the human race with ideas must be prepared to see them misunderstood. - H.L. Mencken

    Come from the land of the ice and snow...

  9. #1989
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    Re:Official Joke Page II

    So there's this 80 year old virgin and she suddenly starts to get an itch around her crotch. As days passed, the itch continued so she decided to get it check out by the doctor.

    The doctor told he she had crabs, to which she knew was impossible since she was still a virgin. Therefore, she decided to wait a couple more days to see if it got any better. 2 days later, the itch still persisted. She decided to then get a second opinion.

    The next morning she went to another doctor and told him that the previous doctor said she had crabs. She went on to explain that she had never had sex before, so therefore it can't be true.

    After evaluating her he gave her a new diagnosis. "Mam' you don't have crabs, but your cherry is rotten and you have fruit flies."
    "There are 3 things that sell in America:
    Violence, sex, and drugs.
    The only way you are going to make this game more appealing to the public than it was before is if there are on field orgies at halftime and the domes become massive opium dens."

    [img width=450 height=55]http://img216.imageshac

  10. #1990
    gregair13's Avatar
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    Re:Official Joke Page II

    We're bringing purple back.

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