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  1. #21
    VikingMike's Avatar
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    Re: T.O's agent a d*ck..

    "WI-ULT-MOSS-FAN" wrote:
    "BBQ Platypus" wrote:
    Here's a related humor article, from sportspickle.com.

    [align=center][size=18px]U.S. Government Grinds to a Halt After President Bush Hires Drew Rosenhaus, Demands New Contract[/size][/align]

    Much of the U.S. government came to a virtual standstill this week after President Bush hired sports super-agent Drew Rosenhaus, and said he would hold out until he receives a better contract.

    “I’m the leader of the free world here, people. The most powerful man in the world, yet I make only $400,000 a year,� said Bush. “That’s pathetic. Think of all I’ve done and how important I am for the country. It’s time I’m rewarded for that.�



    Rosenhaus, who has recently been hired by high-profile NFL receivers Plaxico Burress and Terrell Owens to get them large, multimillion dollar deals, said he hopes to do the same for the President.

    “It would be one thing if President Bush was a one-termer, but he willingly stepped forward for the country and took what was offered for a second term,� said Rosenhaus. “But now it’s time the country rewards him for the loyalty he’s shown and ups his salary. We’re looking for something in the ballpark of $30 or $40 million a year, which is really quite a bargain when you consider some athletes CEOs make that much money, whereas the President is running the entire country.�

    The President will not sign any bills, visit with foreign dignitaries, hold any meetings, or conduct any other of his official duties until he receives a new deal.

    Bush also said that he only has the best interests of his family in mind.

    “As president, just like an athlete, you only have a limited period of time to make some bank,� said Bush. “Four years, eight years tops. Right now I’m not making any more than what a crappy middle reliever does, for crying out loud. I have to make sure my family has enough money to live on once I’m out of office.�

    Bush acknowledged he may have numerous income streams out-of-office, but said it would be irresponsible of him to count on that.

    “Sure, I might be able to make millions in speaking or consulting fees once I’m done being president, but that’s not a given. I need to get paid now,� he said. “The clock is ticking. If I don’t get a new deal soon, we’ll probably be attacked again by terrorists. Plus, not giving me a raise, the Commander-in-Chief, would mean you don’t support the troops. And you support the troops, don’t you?�
    No no, It would take a guy as stuck up as John Kerry to do something like this. After all, "I only sail in yachts over 75 feet" yar yar yar
    Yeah..."and I watch the Packers play at Lambert Field."
    Any man who afflicts the human race with ideas must be prepared to see them misunderstood. - H.L. Mencken

    Come from the land of the ice and snow...

  2. #22
    Vikes's Avatar
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    Re: T.O's agent a d*ck..

    What a hell of a capitalist! I should get this guy to renegotiate my salary at work. Long Live the Free-Market!
    300

    The rigors of Spartan life. Leonidas is cast out into the wild, and survives the harsh winter to return to his home, when he is crowned King ....a Viking!

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  3. #23
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    Re: T.O's agent a d*ck..

    "Vikes" wrote:
    What a hell of a capitalist! I should get this guy to renegotiate my salary at work. Long Live the Free-Market!
    Does the Free-Market allow teams to negotiate the salary DOWN if a player plays below acceptable performance levels the year after they sign a player to a huge contract...does that player have to give back some of his bonus as well? NO

    Better yet, if our team sucks, do we get a partial refund of the ticket prices that we pay to see them stink up the joint? NO

    The fact is that it is not REALLY a FREE MARKET...not as long as certain entities have MONOPOLIES on certain things...eliminate the monopolies then we will REALLY see who deserves top dollar.

    NOT T-HO or J-Squawk, that's for sure!
    BANNED OR DEAD...I'LL TAKE EITHER ONE

  4. #24
    DarrinNelsonguy's Avatar
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    Re: T.O's agent a d*ck..

    I may have said this before but Rosenhaus is ruining football.
    Where is Jerry Maguire when you need him? LOL
    "Hard work beats talent, when talent doesn t work hard."

  5. #25
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    Re: T.O's agent a d*ck..

    Weekly Update:

    Rosenhaus is STILL a D*CK!!!
    BANNED OR DEAD...I'LL TAKE EITHER ONE

  6. #26
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    Re: T.O's agent a d*ck..

    Najeh Davenport has Rosey as an agent now.. I hate that guy.. why exactly do people come to drew?

  7. #27
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    Re: T.O's agent a d*ck..

    I heard that Rosend*ck is negotiating a clause in Najeh's contract that will require that the Packers provide a personal stall for Naj in the Packer bathrooms so that he can "practice"! :lol:
    BANNED OR DEAD...I'LL TAKE EITHER ONE

  8. #28
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    Re: T.O's agent a d*ck..

    "cajunvike" wrote:
    I heard that Rosend*ck is negotiating a clause in Najeh's contract that will require that the Packers provide a personal stall for Naj in the Packer bathrooms so that he can "practice"! :lol:
    He should have a colostomy bag! Probably a really strong one, don't need a rupture during the game! :lol:

  9. #29
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    Re: T.O's agent a d*ck..

    Must be f'ing nice!!!

    http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/columns/story?columnist=garber_greg&id=2072819
    BANNED OR DEAD...I'LL TAKE EITHER ONE

  10. #30
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    Re: T.O's agent a d*ck..

    ya he's on the show PTI.right now.. this guy is so full of crap. he was saying that he wasn't a bad guy and that he was thinking of the sport when he is representing his agents. God i hope that NOBODY from the vikings every try and get him as their agent. he the exact kind of agent "Jerry Maguire" was talking bout, he probaly doesn't give a flying F about the players. all bout the $$$$$.
    b07c3df44d1c1ef4f2f2dc468267cdf3

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