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  1. #21
    singersp's Avatar
    singersp is offline PPO Newshound
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    Re: Possibly the stupidest quote I have ever read...

    Subject: railroad tickets

    George and Laura Bush and Bill and Hilary Clinton are traveling by train
    to the Super Bowl. At the station George and Laura each buy a ticket and
    watch as Bill and Hilary buy just one ticket. "How are the two of you
    going to travel on only one ticket?" asks George W, astonished at what he
    is seeing.


    "Watch and learn," answers Hilary. They all board the train. George and
    Laura take their respective seats but Bill and Hilary cram into a toilet
    together and close the door. Shortly after the train has departed, the
    conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the toilet door
    and says, "Ticket, please." The door opens just a crack and a single arm
    emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.


    The Bushes see this happen and agree it was quite a clever idea, so after
    the game they decide to try a similar plan on the return trip. When they
    get to the station they see the Clinton's at the window buying a single
    ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the Clinton's see that
    the Bushes don't buy any ticket at all. "Aren't you taking a terrible
    chance by traveling without a ticket?" says Hilary. "Live and learn,"
    answers Laura Bush.


    When they board the train the Bushes cram themselves into a toilet and the
    Clinton's cram into another toilet just down the way. Shortly after the
    train leaves the station, George W. leaves their toilet and walks over to
    the Clinton's toilet, knocks on their door and says, "Ticket, please."


    And you're still trying to figure out how the Democrats lost that
    election.

    "If at first you don't succeed, parachuting is not for you"

  2. #22
    MrGopher16's Avatar
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    Re: Possibly the stupidest quote I have ever read...

    "FedjeViking" wrote:
    Of course it was Bush! My bumper sticker read: "A village in TX is missing it's idiot!"

    For fun type: miserable failure - in Google and hit the "I'm feeling lucky" button and watch what comes up first. Hurry before Google fixes it!
    haha i saw that, i wonder how many people have done that and seen it...

    You wouldn't think it would be common to just randomly type in miserable failure into google and see what happens...
    ;-)

  3. #23
    singersp's Avatar
    singersp is offline PPO Newshound
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    Re: Possibly the stupidest quote I have ever read...

    "FedjeViking" wrote:
    For fun type:

    miserable failure - in Google
    and hit the "I'm feeling lucky" button and watch what comes up first.

    Hurry before Google fixes it!
    I tried that in "Google Images" & this is what I got;


    "If at first you don't succeed, parachuting is not for you"

  4. #24
    VKG4LFE's Avatar
    VKG4LFE is online now Jersey Retired Tetris Champion, Monkey GO Happy 4 Champion
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    Re: Possibly the stupidest quote I have ever read...

    "Prophet" wrote:
    Maybe the stupidest quote I have ever read.

    _"They don't want to just sit there, line up and play football. They want to try to catch you off guard. They don't want to play smashmouth football, they want to trick you. They want to catch you substituting, know what I mean? They don't want to just call a play, get up there and run a play. They want to make you think. They want it to be a thinking game instead of a football game." (Steelers linebacker Joey Porter, on the Colts)

    Way to give the colts some bulletin board material, moron!! Oh well, GO COLTS.

    I get the most pissed off looks from people with my VKG 4 LFE Wisconsin license plate, and I LOVE IT!!

  5. #25
    Ltrey33 is offline Jersey Retired
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    Re: Possibly the stupidest quote I have ever read...

    "BBQ Platypus" wrote:
    Coach Dungy: "I'm bored with just plain old 'football.' Let's play a game of 'thinking' instead!"

    Peyton: "That's a great idea! Let's change the names of the positions, too! I'm tired of being a quarterback! I want to be a Transformer!"

    Freeney: "And I want to be a battle tank!"

    Coach Dungy: "Why not? We're playing a completely different game! But I'm bored with it already! Let's play 'Hungry Hungry Hippos!'"

    Colts: "Yay!"
    No way BBQ, they want at "thinking" game! That means they're going to go out and play Risk or Clue, maybe a little Stratego too.

  6. #26
    BBQ Platypus's Avatar
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    Re: Possibly the stupidest quote I have ever read...

    "ltrey33" wrote:
    "BBQ Platypus" wrote:
    Coach Dungy "I'm bored with just plain old 'football.' Let's play a game of 'thinking' instead!"

    Peyton "That's a great idea! Let's change the names of the positions, too! I'm tired of being a quarterback! I want to be a Transformer!"

    Freeney "And I want to be a battle tank!"

    Coach Dungy "Why not? We're playing a completely different game! But I'm bored with it already! Let's play 'Hungry Hungry Hippos!'"

    Colts "Yay!"
    No way BBQ, they want at "thinking" game! That means they're going to go out and play Risk or Clue, maybe a little Stratego too.
    Hey! Hungry Hungry Hippos is a thinking man's game! Where would Albert Einstein be without Hungry Hungry Hippos?


    "This is my timey-wimey detector. It goes ding when there's stuff."

  7. #27
    ChezPizmo's Avatar
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    Re: Possibly the stupidest quote I have ever read...

    Yeah, he didn't word that very well when he said that, but I know what he is trying to say...

    I think....
    [size=11pt]"The only thing better than food & football is maybe Brett Favre."


    [size=8pt]


    -John Madden on Thanksgiving while on "Mike & Mike In The Morning"

  8. #28
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    Re: Possibly the stupidest quote I have ever read...

    You know this whole thread is dead on. I mean if you listen to announcers, players, coaches ,and other sports know it alls, You hear the word genius thrown around like a pass in the run and shoot offense. I mean its not like they are discovering a cure for cancer.

    Mike
    I am an avid Viking fan, but also am an avid restoration guy of vintage Mopar(Chrysler, Dodge, Plymouth)B bodies

  9. #29
    FedjeViking is offline Ring of Fame
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    Re: Possibly the stupidest quote I have ever read...

    "ChezPizmo" wrote:
    Yeah, he didn't word that very well when he said that, but I know what he is trying to say...

    I think....
    Your better than me then. I can't understand it at all.
    [move]"Our day WILL come!! I just hope I LIVE long enough to see it!"[/move]

  10. #30
    Prophet Guest

    Re: Possibly the stupidest quote I have ever read...

    Porter continues his brilliance.

    =============================================

    PORTER PUSHES IT TOO FAR
    16 January 2006
    pft.com

    Steelers linebacker Joey Porter's mouth gets him into plenty of trouble, in a variety of circumstances. Prior to games, during games, and after games -- with other teams and within his own organization.

    And now he's very likely to be in trouble with the league, due to some gum-flapping in which he engaged after Sunday's win over the Colts regarding the quality of the work of the officials

    "I know they wanted Indy to win this game," Porter said. "The whole world loves Peyton Manning, but come on man, don't take the game away from us.

    "I felt they were cheating us. When the interception happened, everybody in the world knew that was an interception. Don't cheat us that bad. When they did that, they really want Peyton Manning and these guys to win the Super Bowl. They are just going to straight take it for them. I felt that they were like 'We don't even care if you know we're cheating. We're cheating for them.'"

    Joey, baby. You gotta know when to zip it. Let the reformed sock puppets crow about the bad calls (and crow they did). Let the fans bitch about the perceived injustice. They can't be fined.

    But you can be. And you will be.

    Expect it to be a big one.

    As to the substance of Porter's comments, we don't really think that the refs were trying to deliver the Colts to Detroit. We just think that the officiating generally sucked this weekend, and that the NFL should be letting out a huge sigh of relief that the Steelers ultimately prevailed.

    If they hadn't, 15,000 or so folks wearing black and gold likely would have arrived this morning at the Commish's office in New York for an unscheduled visit.

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